I am (also) lucky

I realize that life has given me so many hard times and most of it, i curse.
And only this time i can see it another way around, flipped my way of thinking and let me share it for my own notes..

I nearly understand that in life we're our own life architect.
We draw, design, build and maintain how we want our life to be.
We're the goddest of ours

Most of people (includes me) might have times when we feel ungrateful for who we are. 
Bornt not pretty, not rich, not genius, not perfect or just nobody
We often envy people who was bornt with that lucky states.
It's true that they are lucky to be bornt pretty, rich or genius or perfect or somebody..
They have a good start
They have 'more' than regular people
They have those flashy life effortlessly

But..

We also need to remember :
We are prepared for OUR OWN portion of gift, self-earn, lose, chance in life.
It's just a matter of time, when and how, now or later.
A matter of different start point, with a possibilities with same or greater finish
It depends on us whether we just stare and envy on other's start or whether we know how far we should run for it

Remember the story of 'rabbit and turtle race' where slow-walker turtle who doesn't have the capabilities to win over the fast-runner rabbit, surprisingly win the race.
- Turtle never stares on rabbit's start point as a fast-runner; turtle has a dream with him, keep running and never give up; turtle learns from rabbit arrogancy and laziness -

"It's okay to be slow, as long as u don't stop", deeply said by confucius

(28+60) days

It was really tough on me, on us.

Not only didn't prepare for.
Had VVIP in ur life stayed in hospital for that super long period, bunch of unimaginary things influenced.
It was a total mess. I was a total mess.
My heart was pulled out and in, played by situation.
My mind wasn't normal.
My body was exhausted.
Mentally, emotionally, physically, financially examined.
No other option beside facing it.
I was placed and pushed to be a sudden tough, wise, strong, helpful, patient, smart, rich and super woman that world ever have, that I ever imagine I could be.
(I supposed to be written in history by then)

and i am NOT alone

 

No regrets

I oppose him most of the time, he called me rebel.

For him
Brave,independent and fierce should belong only for man. Woman shouldn't have it.
But that's what I am.
Acceptance without experiencing it, follow what he thinks is right.
It's definitely not me.

He wanted me to be a doctor while I wanted to be an architect, a man job he said.
He said I should have talked softer.
He said I'm too naïve as i don't know what the real life is.
He fought with me several times, everytime we talked about my plan.

Answered, with additional :)

Down
I almost lost hope.
I live my day in worries.
I spend my night with thinking.
News coming up.
Most of them shaking my braveness.
Most of them attack my heart.
Thumping, thumping, thumping.
What if what if...

Through Merry Riana

Here I am writing about someone whom I salute.
Not only for her achievement, but also her survival to stand strong-change life-success her dreams.
Happened when I felt down, so much, I tried to find an enterpreneur community or anything that could make me feel better.
I am an extrovert person. I need to share my life, my problems.
I got suggestion from my sister to learn from Merry Riana. A girl who made her first million dollars at age 26.
Therefore I'm curious. I did open her blog, followed her twitter and finally read her books. 
A gift from a friend and Mimpi Sejuta Dollar (A Million Dollar Dream), by Merry Riana
So let me share my interpretation for what I've read and learnt from her...
 
Dare to dream BIG.
Whatever u dream on, do it persistently. It always has a result, for sure.
Have a never ending spirit, commitment, hard work, discipline, hope, faith, love to make a change in ur life.
We have a bigger energy inside more than we thought. And using that energy to realize what we want is impossible POSSIBLE.
There are times we will fail, so many times. We feel down. We lose hope.
And that's the part of the journey that we should learn of. Not to regret of. Not to be focus on.

"The darkest night is eventually the sign that the sun will shine"

The hardest time of our life is eventually the sign that we're moving closer to our dreams.
So hang on. Keep moving, on a right track, with purpose, with target.
Everythings happens for a reason.
A good reason.