live our life to the fullest NOW

I didn’t know how does it feel to lose someone, forever

Now I know…

I was grown up with my grandma as my second mother.

I love her. She is beautiful, she gives me more than her daughter, she loves me a lot, lets me sleep on her bed, throws my milk when I tell her I don’t like it, helps me with my before-school preparation, kills a cockroach for me. 

I lost her.

I didn’t see her last breath.

I cried.

4^th December 2010, I lost my auntie.

I love her. She is a kind and loveable person, funny, like to make joke and laugh loudly, she loves to eat- a lot, she teased me bout how she already got married in her 26^th when me,25^th, haven’t planned for it

I saw her in coma for the very first time, that was also my last time to see her

I saw her last breath

I saw doctor tried to pump her heart

I saw all of us crying, laying on the floor and praying

She left us.

She left her big families, her husband, 7yo daughter and 2weeks baby boy who was emergency-bornt when she suddenly dropped to coma.

Life is unfair.

Life shouldn’t give up my auntie.

Life should have a power to let her still alive.

Sometimes, u can go through the first storm. But not for the second.

I was woken up to fact that

My life, ur life, our life is just a temporary

So, what if today is my last day?

What if I haven’t fulled my life?

I'm still wondering what will I do

Maybe it’s simply just be with my beloved one

therefore,

I was enlighted..

"death ends a life, not a relationship"

(nicely written in “Tuesdays with Morrie” by Mitch Albom)

I do wish for them to still be alive, here. Losing someone, forever, is hard.

But they are still alive, just there.  

But they are still alive here, in my heart. It’s a matter of place.

Death could change nothing about my relationship with them.

And I love them, forever.

We’ll never know whether we’ll have tomorrow, 

so live our life to the fullest NOW

Let's do our best!

“Shoot the moon. Even if you miss, you'll land among the stars.”

Additional notes:

And I love u all, my families and my friends, forever.